Pookie Does Not Have a Drinking Problem, and neither do I.

On Saturday we (me, Mamaw and Shel) hosted a Bridal Shower at a fancy-schmancy restaurant. Mamaw rented the party room and we arrived early to set things up. Since my kids love a good party, they came along. To entertain them, I brought the usual. Markers, paper, puzzles and toys. We were there about 10 minutes when I looked over to an unoccupied corner of the room and saw something odd on one of the white linen table cloths. I walked over. There it was, in 2 inch high, shakey blue letters
BUD LIGHT
Yep. Someone (someone named Pookie) had taken a blue marker and written BUD LIGHT on one of the restaurant’s table cloths. Within 10 minutes of arriving. BUD LIGHT. An Alcoholic Beverage meant to be enjoyed by adults only.

Why “BUD LIGHT”? I don’t know! Why does he write “CARSON PIRIE SCOTT” a dozen times a day, complete with the star/flower logo and a 5 year old’s best attempt at cursive. Why does he write “GONZO PRRINDUCTINS MY VARE ON CARTOON STUDYO” using invented spelling that is pretty near accurate? Why does he refer to bears, frogs, fire trucks and dinosaurs by their proper Spanish names? Why does he hold his plate up and proclaim “WORLD CHAMPIONSHIP BBQ”, just like Guy Fieri does in that TGI Friday’s commercial?

Because he is Pookie and he pays so much attention to every commercial, TV show, book, song and print ad that he sees. He is really the ideal consumer. If he had any money and a car, he would SOOOOO be at TGI Fridays ordering the real “WORLD CHAMPIONSHIP BBQ” just so that he could hold the plate up and do it right, not with a PBJ, but with real BBQ. He would also buy just about anything at CARSON PIRIE SCOTT just so that he could have a plastic bag with their logo on it.

So, he sees a BUD LIGHT commercial and it totally sinks in. He likes the way it sounds, I guess. We call him BUD sometimes, so maybe that is why he likes it. Or maybe the commercial has a dog in it, or a funny noise, or some dancing beer bottles. It must have had something that spoke to him. It makes me feel like a bad mother, because I know that waiter was thinking “Sheesh Lady. Lay off the booze while the kid is around.” But, I swear, Pookie’s interest in BUD LIGHT is a complication of autism. Not a indicator of my poor parenting. If he was going to start doodling the name of my vices he would have written
$1 Large Diet Coke, available for a limited time only
or
Novelty Fabric
or
King of Queens

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