Compliments of Pookie’s Special Ed teacher, a list of ways to reduce Holiday stress for a child with Special Needs:
For Car Trips:
1. Travel in 2 cars so that someone can return home with a child who gets distressed.
2. Eat before you leave, or bring a snack along.
3. Bring a quiet toy, such as a calculator or coloring book
For Social Gatherings:
1. Arrive early to let your child get accustomed to the growing number of people.
2. If he/she becomes distressed, find a quiet place to chill, or go for a walk.
3. Bring a favorite toy from home.
4. Before the event, take time to look at pictures of the people you will see, talking about each person and learning their name.
5. Before the event, do “Social Stories” and practice simple courtesy phrases and responses to questions (How are you? I am fine. How is school. Its Fun.)
6. Let trusted others spend time with your child to help.
7. Its OK to be selective in the events you attend.
For Shopping Trips:
1. Go early, before the stores open. Walk around, get familiar with the building, buy a snack, look at the fountain, etc. Maybe you stay and shop, maybe you go home right then. Increase the time spent at the mall each time.
2. Be positive and offer small rewards for staying close.
3. Teach your child not to touch things when shopping. Visit a clothing store or another store with unbreakable items first. Give your child a chance to model behavior and practice.
4. Bring a helper to offer an extra set of eyes and hands, to help keep your kids safe.
5. Provide earplugs or headphones to moderate noise and activity around them.
For Church:
1. Bring a family member or friend to stay with your other kids, if you need to walk outside with your child.
2. Bring a quiet object of concentration or visual focus, like pictures, books or stuffed animals.
3. Give your child a job, like greeting people, gathering up bulletins left in the pews after the service, etc.
This is a great list. I wish someone would write a list of how to make the holidays less chaotic and stressful for typically developing children. Oh wait! This list might work for that too! Huh, it seems we have found another way in which Special Needs children are just like their typically developing peers.
On a serious note, I do like this list. These are things that would be helpful for both Pookie and Geetle. The underlying message in this list is that if we put as much effort into giving our children opportunities to behave as we put into yelling at them after the fact, our children will behave. It takes forethought and planning to do these things, take snacks for the trip, bring books, practice successful shopping trips, etc. But it pays off big time.
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Angela said,
December 21, 2007 @ 9:18 am
It’s kind of funny, but my mom got soooo much heat for implementing some of the things on this list with my sister and I. Now I’m getting heat for implementing them with my own children. Both my husband and my parents are divorced, so that gives us at least 4 places to visit in two days, oh yeah, my husband doesn’t get home from work until 6 pm Christmas eve night. I think that some people get so wrapped up in the appearance of “MY family LOVES ME oh so much, they ALL made it here for a command performance”
One think my mom always did when we were out and about, and showing signs of an impending meltdown: She always pulled us aside, and told us how proud she was, that she new that behaving wasn’t always easy, and that we were doing such a GREAT job. If we saw a kid in Meltdown Mode, which for whatever reason makes other kids want to copy them, she always said in a whisper to us: I’m so glad you guys would NEVER embarrass me that way, that poor mother/grandma/whatever. I’m not sure that developmentally that last one was a good one to employ, but It always worked for us.