Be A Good Mom

I have a pet peeve.  I will explain it to you, and then you will understand…and probably agree.

Did you ever notice that most times someone uses your name in a sentence, you could easily replace the name with “Jackass” and the person’s true intent comes out?  I will give you an example.  Imagine this conversation:

BAGM:  We should do something about that piece of loose siding on the back of the house.
BAGD:  Yeah, I know.
BAGM:  Its really loud, I wonder if the kids can hear it banging at night.
BAGD:  I’ll look at it when the weather gets warmer.
BAGM:  And if the wind catches it just right, it might blow right off.   Might be hard to replace.
BAGD:  Yeah.  Good project for Springtime.
BAGM:  If its rainy and windy, is water getting in behind it?  Could it cause mold?
BAGD:  Beagoodmom, Its 10 degrees outside and the piece of loose siding is 15 feet up the back of our house.  I’ll look at it when the weather gets warmer.

Now, try the same conversation, replacing my name with the word “Jackass.”

BAGM:  We should do something about that piece of loose siding on the back of the house.
BAGD:  Yeah, I know.
BAGM:  Its really loud, I wonder if the kids can hear it banging at night.
BAGD:  I’ll look at it when the weather gets warmer.
BAGM:  And if the wind catches it just right, it might blow right off.   Might be hard to replace.
BAGD:  Yeah.  Good project for Springtime.
BAGM:  If its rainy and windy, is water getting in behind it?  Could it cause mold?
BAGD:  Jackass, its 10 degrees outside and the piece of loose siding is 15 feet up the back of our house.  I’ll look at it when the weather gets warmer.

See what I mean?  Think of the last time someone (boss/spouse/etc) used your name in a sentence.  See?  The only time I hear my name around here is if BAGD is yelling up/down the stairs for me, or in the “Jackass” context.  However, I am OK with it.  BAGD and I laugh about it…he knows it bothers me.   He thinks its cute.

But now Pookie  has been doing it.   He calls me “Mama,” of course.  But the intent is still there.

I want milk, Jackass.
Come sit in the tent, Jackass.
I want to go for a ride in the car, Jackass.
I had it first, Jackass!

Its starting to get on my nerves…but I also think its cute when he calls me “Mama” and its a good developmental thing.  So, I guess I will let it go.

Giggles is still eating her hands all day.  All day…every day.  If you pull one out, she sticks the other one in.  Sometimes, in her rush to get a hand in there, she ends up sticking a blanket or toy in too.  But I do not think that is on purpose. 

We keep feeling her gums.  I bet she will have a tooth soon. 

On Monday, Pookie had his kindergarten physical.  BAGD took him.  When they came back I asked Pookie some questions.

BAGM:  Pookie, where did you and Dad go?
Pookie: School, to school.
BAGM:  No, not to school.  Where did you and Dad go today?
Pookie:  Doctor.
BAGM:  The doctor!?  What happened at the doctor?
Pookie:  Shot.
BAGM:  You got a shot?  How many shots?
Pookie:  Two!
BAGM: where did they give you the shots?
Pookie:  (touching his thighs) Right here.  In my leg.
BAGM:  Did it hurt?
Pookie:  No.

As you can see, he is getting very good at answering questions.  Sometimes, there is a bit of random echolalia in the middle of the conversations, but other times not.

On Saturday, Pookie and I spent the day together. First I took him for a haircut, which he tolerates, but does not really like. Then he said he wanted to go to Chilis. I thought that was a fine idea, except it was only 10:15 in the morning. So we wasted some time and made it to Chilis at 11am, just as they were opening. After lunch, we went to Walmart and I let him walk around where ever he wanted. It sounds like a weird thing, but its sort of payback for all the times I drag him there and he has to follow me around. He likes to be in charge once in a while, so we go. Then we went to Gameworks, which is sort of a Chuck E Cheese for older kids/adults with lots of arcade games. He did Skeeball and tried the crane game. He had fun, but his favorite part was riding the race car arcade games. He is a lousy driver, lets be clear. But this game was the kind that jostled the seat when you hit the wall or another car, so it actually encouraged him to be an even worse driver than usual. Then I took him to Starbucks for our monthly Sign Language Chat. He hit me up for a bagel, milk AND a banana! He tries real hard at sign language, but when he does not know a word, he just wiggles his hands. Its cute.

This month, a deaf woman joined the group and came with her interpreter friend. Up to this point, the group was made up of hearing people with an interest in sign language. She asked me why Pookie and I were learning sign language. I told her it was just another way to keep him communicating and make sure he had all the tools available. She told me that he would do better if we “turned off our voices” at home. I see where she is coming from, but I do not want to turn off Pookie’s voice. He is lucky to be one of the small group of vocal ASD kids. Sure, alot of what he says is echolalic, but at least its communicating and it changes more into real speech every day. I appreciated her interest, but I think her comments just reinforced why we go to sign language. I do not want Pookie to become fluent in sign language. I want him to be aware of words and thoughts…every minute of every day. I want him to know they can be written, spoken, signed, drawn, danced, etc. Any way he wants to get his message out is fine with me.

At the end of our day, BAGD asked Pookie some questions. It went something like this:

BAGD: “Pookie where did you and Mom go today?”

Pookie: “Haircut”

BAGD: “I like your new haircut. You and Mom also drove a car game. What color car did you drive?”

Pookie: “red. red car.”

BAGD: “Are you a good driver or a bad driver?”

Pookie: “Bad Driver.”

Good day.

Well here it is! The first real smile caught on camera! She smiles all the time, but catching it on film is hard.

Once upon a time, before she was Mrs. My Mark, Aunt Shel was a wild and crazy single gal. Well, not so wild, but sort of crazy. Anyhoo…she once had a chance at the greatest opportunity ever presented to a young single girl….she was asked out on a date by Ronald McDonald. Yes, THE Ronald McDonald…in full make up. And she turned him down. I could not believe it. Especially since I had 2 preschool children at the time. I told her…”the least you could have done was gone out on one date! Maybe it would have worked out! Think of how excited Geetle and Pookie would have been!” But, she said no.

Well, selfish Aunt Shel, this is what Thanksgiving would have looked like…… if you had just given him a chance.

My ROCK STAR NAME (first pet & current car): Tessie Dog MPV
My GANGSTA NAME (fave ice cream flavor, favorite cookie): Cinnamon Samoa

My DETECTIVE NAME (favorite color, favorite animal): Red Giraffe
My SUPERHERO NAME (”The” + 2nd favorite color, favorite drink): The Turquoise Yogurt Milk

My STRIPPER NAME ( the name of your favorite perfume/cologne/scent, favorite candy): Romance Raisinets
My WITNESS PROTECTION NAME (mother’s & father’s middle names ): Joanne James
My TV WEATHER ANCHOR NAME (Your 5th grade teacher’s last name, a major city that starts with the same letter): Wyeth Waterloo
My SPY NAME (your favorite season/holiday, flower): Fall Daisy

My CARTOON NAME (favorite fruit, article of clothing you’re wearing right now + “ie” or “y”): Banana Khaki

My HIPPY NAME (What you ate for breakfast, your favorite tree): Cinnamon MiniWheat Willow
My YOUR ROCKSTAR TOUR NAME (”The” + Your fave hobby/craft, fave weather element + “Tour”): The Photoshop Rainy Day Tour

Pookie asks me to draw things for him all the time recently.  He is really specific about what he wants.  Yesterday it was:

• a red crab
• a duck
• a green octopus
• a yellow star
• a bear
• oranges
• green leaves
• grapes
• a cloud
• black shoes
• a dragon
• a blue whale
• a dog
• a bird
• a yellow giraffe
• a green frog

Quite a cast of characters.  Once they are drawn he wiggles back and forth, happily.   Not sure why.   But these are obviously important to him.   I am not very good at drawing these things….at all.  But he says they are fine.  Awww shucks.

Scene:  home office.  BeAGoodDad’s  (BAGD’s) current workspot, 40 hours a week, shared with BeAGoodMom (BAGM) when she works at home, about 10 hours a week.    BAGD has just finished for the day and is heading upstairs to to send Babysitter Mamaw home.  Prior to finishing his day, he had been enjoying a few cookies at his desk.

BAGD - “I’m going up.  Come up when you want.”

BAGM- “OK.  Hey!  Take those cookies with you.”

BAGD- “Are you kidding?  The kids are up there.”

End Scene.

If you don’t believe me, just as Giggles. 

If you say “poopie poopie poopie!”  She laughs like a crazy woman.  So far, its the only thing that really makes her laugh.  But, now that I do it….and BAGD does it….and Geetle does it, she is getting a little tired of hearing about “POOPIES!”  So, I predict that by this time tommorrow, it will not be as funny to her.