Be A Good Mom

Sometimes I think I do the world a big disservice by blogging about our life with Pookie. We try to keep a positive attitude, so that is what you get to read. Which means you don’t know how hard it really is. Its alot harder than you could ever imagine. Your perception of it is not real. Its propaganda that I control. But I write the propaganda to fool myself too. So, maybe it would exist either way. I don’t know.

Well, today’s the day. The first day of school. *sigh*
They are both gone. So, the morning went fine. Pookie figured out that going to school today meant that he could not stay home and play, so he did (out of the blue) tell me that he was not going today. But as we kept getting ready, he changed his mind. He has been hooked on 2 hard-cover “I Spy” books recently. We let him take them on the bus today. His ride is so long and he had that trouble last year with staying in his seat. His bus came at 7:10am. Early, but not too bad for a boy that gets up at 5:45 every day, no matter what.

Then we had an hour or so before we had to be at the neighborhood bus stop for Geetle’s bus. She picked out a green Tinkerbell T-shirt to wear today, and her “fast” running shoes. We walked down and she was fine. She only got worried when the other kids started climbing on the bus and she realized that she did not know where to sit. They had assigned seats on her preschool bus, so it was a valid question. I told her she could sit anywhere and not to worry about that there were no seatbelts. At the last second, a 3rd grade neighborhood girl said she would help her. She found a seat and waved to us out the window. This girl, by the way, is Geetle’s May-December friend. She is in 3rd grade (age 8, Geetle is 5), but when she sees us on the lawn, she comes over to play babies with Geetle. They get along well, although Geetle does not always understand the games she makes up.

So, now I work until 11am, when Giggles and I go back to the bus stop to get Geetle. They we have lunch. Then Pookie’s bus comes back (to our front door) at 2ish. Woo. What a day!

My company chooses to celebrate Bring Your Child to Work Day in the Summer, to avoid pulling innocent children out of school just to go and play on the PowerPoint at Mom/Dad’s office. Last week Friday, we held our annual event and this was the first year Geetle and Pookie were old enough to attend. I have worked at my company for 9 years, so they all know me, they all know my kids. I made a point of pulling the organizers aside and reminding them that Pookie had special needs, but they said “no problem.” I knew they would, but I still worried.

Usually, the kids spend the day in the conference room and then visit the floor a few times to sit with Mom or Dad. I decided that I would not work that day, so that I was available for whatever my kids needed me to do. I ended up sitting with Pookie the whole day. He loves school and does great there, but sitting in a conference room at “quasi-school” is not something he understands. So, I sat next to him and we did fine. During the time they kids were supposed to be designing their own company, Pookie drew a dozen Kermit the Frogs. During the time they were supposed to be typing their resumes on the computer, he typed “wiisports” and “dog.” But he was there. He made it.

Surprisingly, my biggest problem that day was from Geetle. Pookie and I needed to take a walk during a particularly boring (to Pookie at least) part. I told Geetle to stay and have fun. As soon as I hit the doorway, she melted down. It was 100% emotion. She ran to me and wimpered “I just want to see Pookie.” So, she went on our walk too.

So, what can I say about bringing your child with autism to Bring Your Child to Work Day? Well, I think you should bring him/her. I think you should plan ahead. Bring books, markers, quiet toys. Stay with them, if needed. Sit either in the back or near the door. Tell the organizers that you may need to leave early or take breaks. Explain in advance what “echolalia” means and that he really can’t just be quiet. Go, have the experience, and come home. Don’t fuss about how it goes. Everyone expects chaos on Bring Your Child to Work Day. Your co-workers should understand a little bit about your world. Mine do. They are respectful and compassionate. Some oversompensate, sure. But that is just them trying to be nice.

BAGD and I always try to make sure that Pookie gets exposed to EVERYTHING in life. We don’t hide him and we don’t let him hide himself. Once we know he has been exposed to something and really tried it, we will probably let him skip it next time. But at least he tried it once. For example, we always ask him whether he wants to go grocery shopping with Mom or stay home with Dad. He usually says “stay home” and we know that is an educated answer because sometimes we make him go and he has figured out that he does not like it.

Am I looking forward to next year’s event? Well…..not right now. It was a stressful day for me because taking Pookie to a new environment is a little like being a Secret Service agent. I have to know where the bathrooms are, when the breaks are, who is in charge, what the kids are supposed to be doing, what they are actually doing, what’s for lunch, how many supplies each kid is supposed to have, whether or not the marker Pookie is using on the whiteboard is actually erasable or not, etc. By next August I am sure I will be ready to do it again. But not today.

For those wondering what a boring insurance company does at Bring Your Child to Work Day, first the kids made their own resumes on Career Kids. Then they made up a company and answered questions about it (what they do, how many employees, what their building is made of, how many trucks they have, etc). Then the loss control guy gave a speech on safety equipment. The kids were given a raw egg and various packaging materials. They were to design a box for the egg that would allow it to withstand a 10 foot drop. Very popular game. Then we had pizza and watched a movie. Finally they decorated a frame to hold a picture they took with their parent. Its hard to make insurance fun for kids, but I think they all had a good time.

I wish I could call in sick to at least one (maybe two?) of my jobs today.

My husband has started another hobby…but this one might earn us some money and will help the blogging community. If you need help with any of your WordPress blog stuff, he has offered to be your personal code monkey, for a fee.

Is he any good? Yeah. I think so. He always gets the job done. And he is a professional programmer in his real life. “Senior EDI Analyst” is his real title, I think. (not really sure….the paychecks just keep coming on the 1st and the 15th). So, I am sure he could help you with your blog.

I will continue to get his services for free, of course. But anyone else who needs Wordpress code assistance, can drop him an email on his blog.

The “Thank You” email.
Love it or Hate it?

Besides my fulltime job as blog author, mother of 3 and all-around awesome example of womanness, I work part time for an insurance company. I prefer email over phone, because everyone in my industry likes a paper trail….its all about the E&O Sarbanes Oxley, baby! So I send dozens of emails a day. Inevitably, some of those emails come back to me as a “reply” with just the text “thanks.” I hate that. Its a waste of time. I guess they do it to maintain the personal touch, the politeness that email takes away. But, for me, its a nuisance.

Sometimes, when I see an email come right back after I sent it out, I ignore it, figuring its just a “thank you.” Usually it is, but sometimes its a “hey, where is the attachment?” or a “nice, but you forgot to schedule my aircraft liability on the dec page.” In those cases, I need to respond, but I sometimes ignore the return email because I assume its a time-wasting “thank you” email. My fault? I guess so. But, you can see how it happens.

My question to you is, is the “thank you” email a good thing? Should we keep doing it, as a society, because it brings back the human touch to cold impersonal emails? Or should we acknowledge that email is for down and dirty conversations and plesantries are not needed?

What do you think?

We bought those “Back to School Supply Kits” from the school, rather than hunting at walmart, Staples, Osco for the EXACT color folders that the teacher wanted. Geetle’s teacher wanted a red, a green, a yellow and a blue folder, a steno notebook, crayons, glue, markers, a pencil box, scissors, kleenex, paints, and a 3 ring binder….$27.17. I think I just got ripped off. Sure, it saved me the trouble of searching high and low for the right supplies (and having them returned on the secnd day of school because they were not exactly right, as happened to a friend of mine last year) but I think I paid WAAAAAY too much. I think I could have gotten that stuff at Walmart for about $10. But I guess I paid for convenience.

And while we are on the subject….is this all she will need for the entire year? No pencils? I would like them to teach her how to write. No art smock? I would like her returned somewhat clean each day. Pookie’s teacher wanted pencils, an art smock, kleenex, markers, crayons, a pencil box, glue, 4 folders, baby wipes and dry erase markers. So, I guess he will be learning to write and how to keep his Monster Truck T-shirt clean while painting. No, wait, he did not take any paints. A smock, but no paints. Paints but no smock. I guess I am to assume that some things are provided by the school. I hope they give Geetle a pencil.

If you are planning a trip to Cincinnati and are looking for ideas for fun things for kids to do in Cincinnati, please check out my posts on the subject. We had a great time in Cincinnati and did not even manage to hit all the hotspots. Cincinnati also has a Children’s museum, a history museum, carriage rides around downtown, great parks, a conservatory, sports arenas and shopping.

To see what we did on our 5 day trip to Cincy, check out:
Cincinnati- Day One
Cincinnati- Day Two
Cincinnati- Day Three
Cincinnati- Day Four
Cincinnati- Day Five

i had fun

Today we left for home! 6-8 hour drive, but we decided that was a piece of cake, so we added a side trip into Peoria to see Great Grandma and take her out to dinner at Applebee’s.
First we said goodbye to Papaw, who we left in Cincinnati. (We took Mamaw home with us for a visit)

Then we drove and drove and drove, with a pitstop at Bob Evans for lunch and one at McDonald’s to play a bit.


Once we arrived in Peoria, we picked up Great Grandma and AUnt Grace and took them out for dinner.

Giggles had a great time playing Peek-a-boo with her tiny horse.

We drove through some bad weather on the way home, but we made it just fine and went right to bed when we finally got home.

Oh, and then the next day I had to unpack the car and the luggage….that deserves a separate post, but I won’t bore you with the details.